What happens when you are in a relationship with someone who is constantly pointing out supposed flaws?
At first you might attempt to cover them up. But this can quickly become a cycle. You cover up one flaw and the person identifies another. It becomes this back and forth game. Such was the case with Brittaney. She fell into the cycle and before she knew it she was changing her hair, her makeup and even adjusting her weight to try to fit her mates ideal and cure all the criticism she received from him.
There’s usually only one end to a game like this. After all the changes this girl made, her boyfriend ended up leaving her for someone younger that he could most likely attempt to mold even more than he did Brittaney. She unfortunately blamed herself, and could have gotten a lot worse mentally, if it wasn’t for her turnaround. She made some major realizations and wrote them down. Her message was so amazing, that it is going viral, inspiring thousands of young people to not buy into this common pattern of behavior which she did.
Here’s the message that Brittaney wrote:
“You always told me I didn’t look good with long hair and that you preferred girls with short hair. So I kept my hair cut above my shoulders at all times. You laughed at me and told me I looked ridiculous when I dyed my hair red when we were together. So a week later I dyed it back blonde.”
“You would always point out if I was wearing too much makeup. (Winged eyeliner and mascara most of the time) So I just stopped wearing it. You told me tattoos and piercings were tacky and ugly. And would try to take out my belly button ring every time you saw it. So I took out my piercings and didn’t get any more tattoos.
You pointed out my stretch marks every chance you got. So I did my best to keep them hidden.”
“You pointed out every time I looked like I had gained weight. So I started eating less every day. You pointed out every single flaw I had. So I lost every bit of confidence I had.
I did everything I could to be what you wanted. I did everything you told me to do. It still wasn’t good enough. You left me for a younger prettier girl. Someone you could mold and shape into what you wanted. Like you tried to do with me. And up until a few months ago I blamed myself for everything that happened. You blamed me too.
But finally I started to see the truth.”
“You weren’t out of my league. I was out of yours. I wasn’t the one who wasn’t good enough for you.
You were the one who wasn’t good enough for me. You couldn’t accept me for who I was. When I took you the way you were.”
“So now here I am a few months later. My hair is past my shoulders. My hair is bright red. I’ve got a new tattoo. New piercings. Started wearing makeup again. I eat whatever I want whenever I want and weigh 135 pounds. I still have my stretch marks.
And I’ve finally gotten my confidence back. I finally see myself looking back at me when I look in the mirror. It’s so hard for me to come out about this and admit that I became so vulnerable because of one guy. Something I always said would never happen. It’s humiliating to even think about how low I got. But what gives me the guts to come out about this is the fact that I overcame it and I’m finally back to who I really am.”
What an inspiring young woman! She realized the importance of self-love and has spread that message to thousands. Help spread her words even more by sharing with all your friends and family!
